Here's most of the good quotes from Invader Zim. They're in order by character...except for quotes that involve more than one person.
Zim, Gir, Dib, Gaz, The Tallest,
Other Characters, Group Quotes.


"More organs means more human. It *will* work." -Zim

"I love you, cold, unfeeling robot arm!" - Zim

"Invader’s blood marches through my veins like giant, radioactive rubber pants! The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!" -Zim

"Inferior human organs!" -Zim
*Zim gets hit with the ball*
"My squeedly spooch!" -Zim

"The Earth is saved! I did it, GIR! Now let's go destroy it." -Zim

"Why am I so amazing?" -Zim

"Zim, don't use the time machine, love, Zim!" -Zim

"The Earth is safe! I did it, GIR! Now let's go destroy it!" -Zim

"GIR, what are you doing!?! Put me down, GIR! Wah, stop! Oh, ow, my organ!" -Zim

"That's it, Dib. Laugh now, yes. Laugh and frolic in your vile meats of evil...meats of evil!" -Zim

"Curse you!!!" -Zim

"Please ma'am, if you don't buy my candy, my little brother will go insane." -Zim

"People of Earth! Prepare to taste the mighty foot of my planet!" -Zim

"I'm human, yep! Human, human, human! Just look at my neck!" -Zim

whenIruletheUniversethankstothisamazingbattlemechBYE!" -Zim

"Hey! Get out of the way! Hey! Hey! Hey! Move it! Hey! Hey! You invoke my wrath!?!" -Zim

"Your magical love adventure begins now!" -Zim

"You're after my robot bee!!!" -Zim

"Don't touch anything...or I'll melt your face off or something." -Zim

"Curse you, snacks! Curse yoooooouuuuu!!!" -Zim


"I'm running, I'm running, whoohoooo! I'm running! Wheehehehe! I'm naked!" -GIR

"Can I be a mongoose dog?" -GIR

" bees" - GIR

"I miss my cupcake." -GIR

"I am Government Man, come from the government. The government has sent me." -Gir as 'Government Man'

"I love this show." -GIR

"Ooh, I like madness!" -GIR

"Let's go to my room, pig!" -GIR

"Aw, somebody needs a hug!" -GIR

"I like you." -GIR

"Tacos!" -GIR

"I love the little tacos. I love them good." -GIR

"But I neeeeed tacos! I need them or I will explode! That happens to me sometimes!" -GIR

"Wait, if you destroyed Dib in the past, then he won't ever be your enemy, then you won't have to send a robot back to destroy him, and then he will be your enemy so you will have to send a robot back-" -GIR
*GIR's head explodes*

"Why my piggy!?! I love-ed you, piggy! I love-ed you!" -GIR

"Let's make biscuits! Let's make biscuits!" -GIR

"I'm dancin' like a monkey!" -GIR

"Aww...I wanted to explode!" -GIR

"My taquitos! Eh, homina, eh... TAQUITOS!" -GIR

"Why is his head so big!?! Why's his head so big!?!" -GIR

"I gonna watch it again!" -GIR

"Me and the squirrel are friends!" -GIR

"It's got chicken legs!" -GIR

"The plug thing! It's not plugged!" -GIR

"Chicken!" -GIR
*GIR laughs*
"I'm gonna eat you!" -GIR

"Aww, you look so cute!" -GIR

"Meooow!" -GIR

"Cows are my frieeeeends..." -GIR

"Doo dee doo dee dooooo, waffles!!!" -GIR

"Hi floor! Make me a sandwich!" -GIR

"He’s gettin’ eaten by a shark!" -GIR


"Do not show fear. This is me without fear... and a 62 pound hall pass." -Dib

"But one day, you'll be sitting in your house feeling all safe and secure, and then you'll look over and I'll be there! Doin' stuff!" -Dib

"Gaz! Taste me! I'm delicious!" -Dib

"My head's not big!" -Dib

"Chickenfoot! Come back! You're not a freak! You're just stupid!" -Dib


"Dib drank the last soda. He will pay." -Gaz

"Don't bother me Dib. I'm in the zone." -Gaz

"Remember earlier, the whole bugging me thing? You're doing it again." -Gaz

"If you wanna keep all your limbs, Zim, you will put me down, you will put me down now!" -Gaz

"Let it be known that from this day, until the end of the day, vengeance will be mine. Dib, you will not know the meaning of peace, for I shall rain misery down upon your pizza stealing heart!" -Gaz

"Can't you see I'm trying to draw a little piggy!?!" -Gaz

"Your voice is stupid!" -Gaz

>The Tallest

"All while gathering crucial information, assessing the planet's weaknesses, making it vulnerable to our big... space ship... gang!" -Red

"Malfunctioning SIR units! Hey! These things are dangerous! Anyone using these could really get hurt! Send them to Zim." -Purple

>Other Characters

"You like ice cream. You like ice cream. You love it. You cannot resist ice cream. To resist is hopeless. Your existence is meaningless without ice cream." -Ice Cream Truck

"My poor insane son." -Prof. Membrane

>Group Quotes

"Oh, I quit when I found out about this." -Zim
"You quit being banished?" -Purple

"Um, is it supposed to be stupid?" -Zim
"It's not stupid. It's advanced!" -Purple

"I put the fires out" -Zim
"You made them worse" -Red Tallest
"Worse...or better?" -Zim

"Now...witness the power of my compass!" -Zim
*compass attaches to GIR's stomach*
"Awww, it likes me!" -GIR

"What is WRONG with these people? This place is just BEGGING to be destroyed!" -Zim
"Woo! I like destroying!" -GIR

"Something is broken and it's not your fault?" -Zim
"I know, I'm scared too." -Gir

"What happened? How did you run out of fuel so quickly?" -Zim
"I emptied it out." -Gir
"You emptied it? Why!?" -Zim
"To make room for the tuna." -Gir

"Hooray for Earth!" -GIR
"GIR, Earth is our enemy." -Zim
"I understaaaand." -GIR

"And then watch you transform, more and more, into what you really are deep down in your heart!" -Zim
"Deep down I'm bologna?" -Dib
"Yes." -Zim
"That's just ... dumb." -Dib
"Dumb like a moose, Dib! Dumb like a moose!" -Zim

"What are you doing GIR?" -Zim
"Nothing....." -GIR
"Nothing or...something?" -Zim

"I was once a man." -Random Rat Person
"But you're a woman." -Dib

"You left what at home?" -Zim
"The guidy, chippy, thingy." -GIR

"Squeedly spooch? Did you hear that, Gaz? That's no human organ! Humans don't have squeedly spooches!" -Dib
"I've got a squeedly spooch." -Gaz

"Incredible! See Gaz? To defeat my enemy, I must study my enemy, then become my enemy, then move in with my enemy, then where my enemy's clothes, then-" -Dib
"You're in my light." -Gaz

"Ms. Bitters, I think a pencil is lodged in my brain. Can I go to the nurse?" -Dib
"How far in your brain?" -Ms. Bitters
*Dib glances down at the pencil*
"Preeetty far." -Dib

"Look at you! You've gone too far! You're a hideous blob of stolen organs!" -Dib
"I've been working out." -Zim

"Hi!" -GIR
"GIR, finally! I need your help! I've been captured!" -Zim
"Yaaaay!" -GIR
"No, that's bad, GIR." -Zim
"Yaaaay!" -GIR

"I'm leaving with or without you, Dib. Preferably without you." -Gaz
"Go on, Gaz. I've got work to do. Fate of the world kind of work!" -Dib
*Zim runs by several times, still screaming*
"Ooh! Can I watch! Wait, no, forget it." -Gaz

"That was your fate of the world work!?! Jumping in a puddle!?! You do realize I'm gonna have to destroy you now." -Gaz "It was worth it. Score one for the human race! Score nothing for the Zim... thingy race." -Dib
"I will destroy you." -Gaz

"I will rule you all with an iron fist!" -Zim
"No, Zim. The machine has assigned you a career in fast food preparation!" -Ms. Bitters
"I will prepare food with my iron fist! Then I will work my way up to ruling you all with my fist!" -Zim
*Zim holds his fist up to Melvin*
"You! Obey the fist!" -Zim

"Now, Dib. I leave you to your... em.." -Zim
"Moosey fate, say moosey fate!" -GIR
"Your moosey fate." -Zim

"Now take me to the equipment room, GIR! Equipment room! Now, GIR!" -Zim
"Do a little dance!" -GIR
"No, GIR! No dance! Just obey me!" -Zim
"Daaance!" -GIR

"Gaz, there's an alien in the house!" -Dib
"You mean besides you?" -Gaz

"They throw planets into it like firewood to keep it burning. And now, they have the Earth." -Zim
"Yay!" -GIR
"No GIR, that's bad." -Zim
"Aw." -GIR
"Do you know what this means?" -Zim
"Yes." -GIR
"You don't really, do you?" -Zim
"Hm." -GIR

"Why was there bacon in the soap!?!" -Zim
"I made it myself!" -GIR

"Hurry GIR! The mission's been compromised! I think we've been seen out of our disguises... by a human!" -Zim
"But Dib's seen us before." -GIR
"And he knows where we live." -GIR
*Zim laughs*
"Dib. No, this is different. This is serious." -Zim

"Don't you care that Zim's trying to destroy all mankind? Huh?" -Dib
"But he's so bad at it." -Gaz

"You're sure they took this one?" - Gaz
"Yes! Wait...I dunno." -GIR

"Your pitiful rescue attempt is nothing but a pitiful failure! Stupid, stinking, humans." -Zim
"Doesn't this station have escape pods?" -Gaz
"Of course, they're right over there." -Zim
*Zim points; Gaz starts to push Dib towards where Zim pointed*
"Stupid, stupid... Hmmm?" -Zim

"It can be dangerous out there." -Prof. Membrane
"That's what the bat's for." -Gaz

"What you need is to give the Game Slave to me or I will plunge you into a nightmare world from which there is no waking!" -Gaz
"But... I'm a better gamer than you!" -Iggins
"I hope you like nightmare worlds!" -Gaz

"Sorry...I'm late...Horrible nightmare visions!" -Dib
"It's called life, Dib. Sit down!" -Ms. Bitters

"Be gone with you! I've had enough of your nonsense from your smelly mouth filled with...corn!" -Zim
"I haven't been eating corn!" -Dib
"LIAR!" -Zim

"I'm not here because I like you, Dib. I'm just here for filthy gargantuan head!" -Zim
"Oh, now it's gargantuan!?!" -Dib

"What's it do?" -GIR
*Dib taps GIR's shoulder*
"Hey! Go away!" -Dib
"Okey dokey!" -GIR

"Kids play without fear in the streets of this humble hamlet! In fact, it's the kind of place where you don't even have to lock the door!" -Host of Mysterious Mysteries
"Who are you!?! Get out of my house!" -Gaz

"GIR! Remember with your brains! You must behave like a human dog monster! Do you understand?" -Zim
"I really don't." -GIR

"Yeah. When's the last time you cleaned yourself?" -Blue
"Define 'self'." -Green

"The MegaDoomer Combat Stealth Mech!" -Red
"I don't like it!" -Purple
"We didn't build it so you could 'like it'! This one's going to planet Meekrob to help Invader Tenn conquer it!" -Red
"Well I should like it." -Purple

"I've put up with you long enough, Dib! Now, fight an enemy you cannot see!" -Zim
"You're right there." -Dib

"Lies! Now, behold the doom cannon!" -Zim
"I can't. It's invisible!" -Dib
"But you can see me?" -Zim
"That's what I said." -Dib
"Oh that's stupid!" -Zim
"Really stupid!" -Dib
"You dare agree with me!?! Prepare to meet your horrible doom!" -Zim

"What do you mean 'victory'!?! Your robot exploded and you didn't destroy me!" -Dib
"It was a trick, yes! Eh, my real plan was to...steal this camera from you! So that you couldn't show these pictures, hah!" -Zim

Oooo...kaaay...Tak, I'm glad you stopped by, it gives me a chance to end our hideous relationship...and enjoy your shrill cry in having been rejected by Zim!" -Zim
"You have got to be kidding." -Tak
"I assure you, I am very serious. Now cry! Cry like you've never cried...before." -Zim

"What is this!?! And what is this plan?" -Zim
*Tak laughs*
"Yes, yes, I'm a master of comedy, now tell me this plan!" -Zim

"My beautiful base!" -Zim
"Part 2 is-" -Tak
"No! My beautiful base! No!" -Zim
"Part 2 is-" -Tak
"No! My beautiful base, no!" -Zim
"Part 2 is-" -Tak
"No!!!" -Zim
"Part-" -Tak
"No!" -Zim
"Okay, I'm-" -Tak
"No!" -Zim
"Okay, I'm leaving now." -Tak
"But you didn't tell me your plan." -Zim

"Oh come on! I like Tak! And she hates you! You're just jealous of-" -Dib
*Zim hops onto the table*
This has nothing to do with jelly! I've been trying to figure out her plan but it's been difficult! She's good. Not good like me, but good." -Zim

"I'm the only one here with the technology to decode the files!" -Zim
"And we're the only ones here with the files to be decoded!" -Dib
"And I'm..." -GIR
*GIR laughs*
"I dunno!" -GIR

"Do things! Make Tak's robot crazy." -Gaz
"Only if you dance with me!" -GIR
"No! Never! Never!" -Gaz
*GIR stares*
"Oh, come on!" -Gaz

"Hey! I like snacks!" -Purple
"He likes snacks, Zim." -Red